We really do train the people how to treat us. Take me for example...
I learned early on in life that a successful survival strategy was to please my parents.
So, later in life I continued to be a people-pleaser and trained people that I would be there for them - which then became our un-written, un-spoken un-wholesome contract.
Then, when something terrible happened to me and I needed help, they were not there or not there in the way I “expected them to be.”
Result: I moved on to train the next person not to be there for me.
Question: How are you training others to be or not be with you?
Insight: Retraining them is a “B____” and quite necessary for you and them.