Women seem to have problems with self-love. Many seem to worry that they’re not doing things well enough. The result of this tiny or large bit of insecurity is that women are overachievers.
When I encourage women to love themselves, work for themselves, and pay it forward, a few smile like I’ve given them the secret to life.
Because I have!
Bosses don’t want to tell women they’re doing too much because, if they knew, women might ask for more money or benefits. It’s reverse psychology, something known as “child psychology” in popular culture.
Recently, a hedge fund manager in California told me that his business development VP, a woman, was his “dumping ground.” He said, “I know it just seems counter-intuitive, but she seems to get everything done. I pay her seventy-five percent less than other people doing her job in San Francisco, so I am a lucky man.”
Let me start with a few questions:
Do you do things at work or anywhere else that make you feel bad?
An organization that encourages employees to tell lies every day can cause the person who values truth to feel bad. The self-audit process is amazing for women because, with a little effort, it’s possible to let go of things that make you feel bad.
Maybe your job makes you feel bad. You are not your job, so it’s easy to change that.
What if you could do things that make you feel good?
The answers to this question are harder for some women to answer. They may realize “It’s been way too long since I felt good!”
Do you trust yourself?
Even if you’re not quite there about loving yourself, your answer to this question is important.
Self-trust is essential to a self-employed person. You’ve got to know that – whatever the situation – you’ll do it right. You’ll do whatever’s necessary according to your moral and ethical code.
Do you believe that we’re all here to help each other? Is this life, or a dress rehearsal?
Unlike Gordon Gecko’s business model of “Greed Is Good,” it’s important to take stock of everything you’re thankful for.
Maybe your gratitude list is small now, but I promise you, it’s going to grow quickly.
Will you enjoy mentoring others on their path to freedom? Or will you pay it forward in other ways?
William Holt is the go-to coach and trainer for executive women wanting to transition to coaching as a way of sharing their professional expertise with the world. He is also the creator of the Holt Coaching Method as well as the founder and leader of the LinkedIn Group - Executive Women´s Growth Forum.
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